I can't believe it, but it's already been a month and a half of me messing my diapers. The timer doesn't expire till late October, so I still have another 55 days of me not touching the potty for anything. I've hesitantly opened up my wishlist again if y'all want to add more time; the link is at the bottom.
Has messing myself gotten easier? Heck yea. I actually kinda like it now.
Has cleaning up gotten easier? Heck nah.
However, since I use baby wipes to clean myself off anyways, who cares where my poo ends up? Better out than in, as they say. Doesn't matter where it ends up to me.
They say that it takes two to three weeks for you to get used to a new routine, and they're right. That mental prompt that sent me to the potty whenever I felt pressure in my bowels has now been replaced by another mental prompt signaling me to stop whatever I'm doing, get on my hands and knees, and push. And frankly, all the kinkiness aside from me pooping myself on purpose, I've learned that it's easier to just poop wherever I'm at than to struggle to find a bathroom. Sure, I know where it is at home, but it's different when I'm out in public. I'm obviously not shitting myself when I'm in public, but if I'm in the car driving home, I'm not opposed to doing the deed in my diaper and just changing when I get home.
That's happened five or six times when I go shopping or when I run some errands in the morning after breakfast. I'm toooootally not setting myself up to mess outside of my home.
Nope. Couldn't be me!
It's funny to think that I'm the only adult on the road with a diaper full of you know what.
Anyways, I didn't really enjoy messing until I embraced it full time. I wouldn't say I hated it before, but I sure didn't like it. Like, if it had to happen, then it had to happen, but now that I'm doing it all the time, though, I'm seeing more benefits than negatives. If you're living by yourself, I think you should give it a shot for a week or so and see what you think. Don't knock it till you try it!
I've kinda gotten over the ickiness of messing my diaper because now it's just something I do now; it's becoming my new normal. Like I said earlier, I used to get down and push as soon as I felt like I had to poop. I would then change immediately after I emptied myself, but now I'm making myself stay in the messy diaper for a couple minutes more each time. I'm not trying to catch any kind of bladder or skin infection here, but a small part of me (that's growing a bit more each day) finds messing my diapers to be downright naughty.
Maaaaaaybe it's because I'm using my vibrator when I'm messing. =P
I'm literally taking a page out of my own book by making myself associate pleasure from the vibrator with messing myself. If I reward myself with enough playtime with the vibrator while I mess myself, I think we'll see more positive results.
It's kinda funny now because unlike before, as soon as I feel like I might have to poop, I'm not trying to hold it anymore. My body knows in the back of my head that I'm totally 100% protected anyways, so I can honestly say that it's a relief that I don't have to worry about that anymore, especially if I'm busy or in the middle of something.
I do still have to be careful around other people, though. Certain poses make me feel a tiny bit of uncertainty about my level of control and if I'm not giving it my full attention, I'm a little afraid that I'll let a little something out when I didn't mean to. Anyways, I'm really grateful for all the support, especially all the diapers! I've definitely been using a lot more diapers than usual because of this challenge, so I'd say it's been working out pretty well so far!
1: Throw away all of your underwear (but keep your bras if you’re a lady!). This leaves you nothing but diapers to wear as underwear, and as we all know, wearing nothing down there can lead to some irritation. Not good for princess parts! Throwing away all of your undies ensures that you’ll have to wear diapers, and nothing but diapers. If you want to truly commit to this, then do that, or if you’re on the fence about it and want to try it out, stash all of your undies in a backpack or something that you can lock or put a lock on, then give that key to your bestie and have them not give it back until a week, two weeks, a month, or however long you feel like! 1a. Buy a large supply of diapers. I chose to go with the Abena M4 for starters, and have kept with it all the way through. For when you start dribbling (see below!), you can switch to a thinner diaper, like the cloth backed Abena M2. For lighter days, I’ve found that tena makes some decent diapers, same with Tranquility/Select...
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